Here are some of the actual thoughts I have had recently about this momentous event:
"If I go back to bed and sleep the rest of the day, will it still happen, or can I still stay 29?"
"It could be worse. I could be 30 AND a Kardashian."
"Oooh! This means I can start throwing out disdainful generalizations about the younger generation, while at the same time becoming increasingly estranged from their daily culture. Also, I will never sound cool using slang again, but will continue to insist on using it to trick myself into thinking I am still relevant. Sick!"
"If I go to another Coldplay concert, I will now be one of those 'older people' I wished last time hadn't showed up to the concert. Dang it all."
"Maybe I should learn piano. I hear it slows the deterioration of. . . um. . . what's the word? Shoot."